my{peace}of*mind*

I am on cloud nine! Why? Belle finally learnt to call me!

I was fixing my iPhone when Dad came up with Belle, asking me to go down to have my dinner. She wouldn’t want to go with Dad after seeing me. So I said I’ll take her down later. While still fixing, I took something for her to play and she baby-talked. I repeated the word 姑姑 in Hokkien. She tried to imitates the sound. And it proved to be fruitful when she finally spoke the words almost perfectly!

This is a day to remember. I am gonna put it as my password from now on!

To begin the story, we need to flash back a little into the past.

Somewhere in April – There was a realignment in the organisation chart and I will be put under another manager but my current manager, Joanna assured me and the rest of the QAs that there is nothing to be alarm of as we still report to her and all the processes (e.g. leave application, HR matters) still remain the same.

22/4/2010 – Notice an email message highlighted in blue (indicating I’m the only recipient) from an unfamiliar sender. It’s actually an email notifying of manager changed in HR. Effective 1/5/2010, my manager, according to the organisation chart would be Aaron.

From: GHRMS
Sent: Thursday, 22 April, 2010 9:20 AM
To:
Subject: Reporting Change –

********************************************
PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO THIS EMAIL

If you have a question or comment, please submit it to ‘Contact HR’

via the @hp Portal -> Quick Links -> Contact HR
********************************************
A reporting change has occurred and you report to Aaron <last name removed> as of 2010-05-01. If you have any further questions, please contact Aaron Silva.

No action required.

19/5/2010 – Aaron’s manager, Ivan from Cyberjaya set up a meeting with the whole SDex team. That was the first time I saw the faces of my “team mates”.

From: Wang, Ivan
Sent: Monday, 17 May, 2010 6:04 PM
To:
Subject: SDEX GSD Meeting
When: Wednesday, 19 May, 2010 2:00 PM-3:00 PM (UTC+08:00) Kuala Lumpur, Singapore.
Where: Innovation-3 Room (B5)

Note: The GMT offset above does not reflect daylight saving time adjustments.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hi All,
Good day. I would like to call for a GSD SDEX team meeting on this coming Wednesday at 2-3pm. The following will be the agenda for this week:

1) Team introduction – All
2) RACI – Ivan & Aaron
3) TCE&Q Project update – Aaron
4) Q&A
5) Next meeting

Thank you.

Regards,
Ivan Wang

3/6/2010 – Noticed another email highlighted in blue today

From: GHRMS
Sent: Thursday, 3 June, 2010 5:12 PM
To:
Subject: Reporting Change –

********************************************
PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO THIS EMAIL

If you have a question or comment, please submit it to ‘Contact HR’

via the @hp Portal -> Quick Links -> Contact HR
********************************************
A reporting change has occurred and you report to Ivan Wang as of 2010-06-01. If you have any further questions, please contact Ivan Wang.

No action required.

7/6/2010 – My new boss OC’ed (term used internally meaning someone sent an instant message via Office Communicator) me, asking if I have 2 minutes to speak to me on the phone. I was surprised and not sure what to do because I don’t know what he want to talk about. Because it is kinda troublesome to call me on my desk phone, I offered to call him instead. So, I called him on his mobile. The main purpose of the call was to know what is my career objectives and what do I think about being a regular employee — an indication that I’d be converted to a badged staff = permanent. He keep insisting that there is nothing confirmed but will let me know. The call ended in less than 5 minutes.

9/6/2010 – Ivan OC’ed me again. This time, asking if I am available for an one-to-one session later in the afternoon at 1530. I looks fine to me and so he sent the invitation. I guess in working environment, everything has to be ni black & white…

From: Wang, Ivan
Sent: Wednesday, 9 June, 2010 10:37 AM
To:
Subject: One on One
When: Wednesday, 9 June, 2010 3:30 PM-4:00 PM (UTC+08:00) Kuala Lumpur, Singapore.
Where: (TBD – A6 meeting room)

Note: The GMT offset above does not reflect daylight saving time adjustments.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hi ,
I would like to have a one on one session with you today. I hope this schedule is ok for you.

Thank You.

Regards,
Ivan Wang

At 1500, I was wondering where will we meet as there are so many meeting rooms on this floor and he did not mention which room. 15 minutes later, I opened up my OC contact list and he was offline, no chance to ask where. 1527, still no sign of him. Then at exactly 1530, I saw Aaron coming out from the small meeting room in front. He was walking toward our area and he signaled me to go over. I followed him to the small meeting room in front. Ivan is already inside.

I sat down in front of both Ivan and Aaron. He started off by mentioning about the phone call we had yesterday and finally broke the news that due to my “good performance” (ahem!) of my 2.5 years of service in HP as a contractor, the management has decided to offer me a conversion to HP regular! Hooray!! Finally, it’s here! He said it will be official on August 1, awaiting for the offer letter from the HR. I have no idea how to respond then and I kept thanking both of them. It was again, a short meeting with me having nothing to complain about or rather, not dare to complain about. Before I was dismissed, both Ivan and Aaron reminded me to keep the news low before everything is official especially to my peers and all. To a certain extent, I do agree about it.

So, tell me… what kind of feeling should I have now?

I was heading home after sending Donny home at Wangsa Maju after Jan Lamb’s talk show at Genting Highlands. It was around 2:00am, I reached the traffic lights before at Sri Bintang. It was red but I went ahead instead because 1) the light showing left is dead, 2) it was late and 3) it is not safe. Unfortunately, there were police standing by after the turn and I got flashed to stop aside. I was like “Oh, shit!”

Standard procedures of showing them my ID and they asked standard questions like where am I heading to, from where, etc. This policeman (I’d called him Police A) said he will issue me a summon and walked away to another policeman (hereafter as Police B) with my ID. He came and asked if I’m angry because I had this “pissed off” face. Then asked the same questions again. Told me again that I ran a red light and asked me why. I told him that it’s late and not safe. The traffic light is not showing red or green for turning left as well. I was kinda arguing with him about the stupid traffic light. He said it’s not their fault that the traffic light is like that. Then again, “I’ll have to issue you a summon, okay?” Note: it’s a question and not a statement. I answered “Okay”. Weird enough, he suddenly said “Okay lah, I’ll let you off with a warning, last warning, okay? The car in front was given a warning as well.”

I am totally speechless but couldn’t care much as I am damn sleepy and tired but enough to write this.

It’s a home I grew up in.
A home I spent almost 2 decades in.
Finally, it’s sold to other family.

I will definitely miss it a lot! :’(

I had a short conversation with Dopey this morning (midnight), probably the last.

I just got out from shower after my badminton game and was chatting with Ann when Google Talk popped. It was Dopey. He has just reached home after a team meeting at 10pm. We had a short chat until 12:30am and I wanted to head to bed as I’m tired after the game. So I greeted him “goodnight” and signed out from Google Talk. I was still on Facebook after that to clear off requests. I saw his name in the chat list. He sent a message through Facebook chat and suddenly lashed out at me.

The conversation on Google Talk and Facebook (only the related part):

Google Talk

Me: wan to go to bed now
Me: Goodnight!
— signed out from Google —

Facebook Chat

Dopey: Hey
Me: Hi
Dopey: Why do u leave just like that?
Dopey: and u said u r going to sleep..
Me: yes, going but i’m clearing off some requests
Dopey: do u know it’s rude?
Dopey: u made me feel as if i’m disturbing u
Dopey: ok. i will not disturb u anymore from now onward
Me: aren’t u a little too sensitive?
Dopey: Leave it!!!
Dopey: Bye!

At that very moment, I was stunned and was like “What? What did I do wrong here?” I bid my goodbye and greeted goodnight before I signed out. Do I have to wait until the other person reply “OK, goodbye and goodnight” before I can sign out and go to bed? Definitely NO! What if they are going to be away forever? Wait for them to come back?? This is ridiculous! And I don’t have to explain why I am doing this or that. So, what if I’m still online after I signed out from other IM? I’ve already told you that I am clearing requests and going to bed shortly.

Every time when I said I’m going to bed, he will ask why not accompany him for a little while… it was after midnight. Hey, it’s weekday and I’m not going to stay up until 3am just to accompany you. I don’t have the obligation to do so.

This is really getting onto my nerve… >”<

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person..
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it; it is real, but only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

From Dopey

Nadrah is planning to go SkyTrex next month and was discussing with Mithun on which one to go for. Some are very extreme and look dangerous. At first, I was trying to find excuses not to go. Usual, I’m anti-social especially with colleagues. She was all excited and asked me which date we should go. She suggested 26th June which I will be in Yogjakarta, 12th June is our monthly meeting, 5th is Agong’s birthday and that left us 19th June. They were so concerned about the fact that I have a metal plate screwed on my collarbone and tried to find one what I can go. Aw~

I’m joining too!

When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high;
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit;
Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.

Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you can never tell how close you are;
It may be near when it seems afar.
So, stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit;
It’s when things go wrong that you mustn’t quit.

Credit: Dopey

When we allow an offense to remain in our hearts, it causes serious spiritual consequences. In the above verse, Jesus named three dangerous results: betrayal, hatred, and cold love.

When we are offended with someone, even someone we care for, we must go to them. Otherwise, we begin to betray that relationship, talking maliciously behind their back to others, exposing their weaknesses and sins. We may mask our betrayal by saying we are just looking for advice or counsel, but when we look back, we see we have spoken negatively to far too many people.

Our real goal was not to get spiritual help for ourselves but to seek revenge toward the one who offended us. How is such an action not a manifestation of hatred? For an offended soul, cold love, betrayal and hatred go hand-in-hand.

Friend’s birthday and I have yet to figure out what present to get for her. When she asked my help to buy a hdd, I thought why not just buy her that. I know that she will not accept it if I tell her first. So I kept everything to myself.

I passed her the hdd few days earlier and I transferred the money she gave me to buy the hdd into her bank account. I called her later at night to tell her. I was expecting some “good” reaction but instead I was scolded. After a few exchange of messages, she said she don’t want to talk about it as she had no mood. Immediately, I felt uncomfortable and eventually it led to hurt.

Was the intention wrong or the action? I don’t know this person anymore.